Monday, October 6, 2008

One Day More, part XVI

Tomorrow is The Boy's CT Scan, which will be interpreted and will help everybody involved schedule his surgery. It's also the official Week XIII of chemotherapy, which is only bloodwork done. Not that he hasn't had bloodwork done every three days over the past couple of weeks... but, whatever. Time to make the donuts.

The Wife and I had another long talk last night about the progress of things. Basically, she's wondering if we'd be better off by her taking November, December and January off from work, under the Family Leave Act. As it stands, we've been missing about 1.5 days per week of work, between anticipated and unanticipated hospital visits. If we're already taking that much time, AND if we're going to start running out of sick days soon, AND if we're making our students' and our colleagues' lives more difficult, then wouldn't it make sense for her to take the time away from school?

Benefits: we know the baby will nap and drink as much as is needed. He loves napping for us, and he loves nursing. We know that he'll be taken to the hospital as needed, and we know exactly what to look for when monitoring his health on a daily basis.

Drawbacks: an extraordinary work week for me during that time, significantly less money coming in and loss of momentum of her program, as a new teacher won't be comfortable for the first month or so of work. Assuming they are able to find someone competant, which is no mean feat.

I don't know. I wonder if we need to do it. I mean, we have an attentive babysitter who is not watching other children. We haven't asked her to do much of anything for him other than take his temperature and apply diaper rash cream. We haven't asked my father, brother or sister-in-law if they'd be willing to take The Boy to any hospital visits. My father doesn't do diapers; we know that. It's a generational thing - Depression-era men have difficulty with some things. But, would it be a big deal for him to pick The Boy up from the babysitters and take him to the hospital, where The Wife will meet him after work? I don't really think so. Same thing for my brother or his wife; she already works at Barnabas. Maybe she takes a longer lunch a little later and meets the babysitter at Barnabas to watch him, or something like that.

The bottom line is that we haven't really explored the options of the people who have expressed multiple offers to help. Now we're at a time when we're starting to really need it. I feel amazingly overwhelmed and stressed out; judging from the fact that I gave an unnecessary hard time to three sections of band today, it's affecting me professionally as well as personally. Maybe it's time to ask some people to take a ride to Barnabas for us, to help out.

My in-laws are coming this weekend, after a second grease fire in a year or so has totalled their kitchen and a good chunk of the rest of the house. In an ironic twist to the college years, they are bringing their laundry with them this weekend. They will likely stay until the surgery, assuming that it is early next week as we anticipate.

On the cute side, The Boy has started rocking back and forth to music while sitting or standing. He also flails his arms, more or less in rhythm with the beat of the music. On Friday night, I had Van Halen's album "Van Halen" playing - bought it on Amazon for $2, thankyouverymuch. He was going nuts, dancing back and forth to the music. He's also starting to clap in rhythm with what he hears, when he focuses on it. It's REALLY cute.

Should we be worried that he's not walking or saying more words than mama / dada? or standing?

1 comment:

Erin said...

No help with the "should she take a leave from work" question. Maybe it would behoove you to look into help from relatives.

But I do have advice for the walking/talking question. Totally normal. Each child develops at his own pace, blah, blah. Our little one is the same age (08/25/07) and he is cruising, crawling, waving, clapping, saying hi and uhoh. Also mum mum mum. Not sure if that is for mummy or nummy (as in yummy food). Not walking though, and barely standing for more than 15 seconds alone - and thats if we trick him into it!

You guys are doing great. Keep up the positive attitudes and relish in the boy's smiles. That will help with the stress.

Good luck with the surgery.