Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Almost Human...

That title, "Almost Human," actually describes both The Boy and Musical Daddy. The Boy is acting like a real two-year old: playing, talking, complaining, "Nonononono," and stuff like that. He slept well last night, mostly because I played goalie and started bouncing people back into play instead of letting them annoy The Boy for no real reason.

Musical Daddy, on the other hand, left the hospital at 9:45AM, after having slept for 45 minutes total (in three chunks), then for another half-hour or so after 8AM. I got the most thorough teeth-cleaning I've ever gotten, from The Wife's cousin, who is a dentist. I stopped at Dunkin' Donuts on the way home for a breakfast sandwich; I considered the decision justified by G-d because the parking space I used still had 15 minutes left on the meter. I got home at 11:15, talked with Mommy for a bit, then changed into my pajamas and went to sleep at 11:45.

Woke up at 5:15.

So, it's almost 6 o'clock, and I've gone nocturnal again. Sigh. I'm going to shave & shower, then run to the comic book store and Trader Joe's before heading back to the hospital for the night. Should be fun.

No news about The Boy. Considering that the surgeon never came, it is likely that we won't have surgery until next week. No word as to whether or not we'll have some time at home before the surgery; likely not, as The Boy was still spiking a fever late at night. It's hard to say what they're going to do, as there isn't the pressure to get everybody home before Christmas in a Jewish household.

I'm not entirely sure how I feel about having absolutely no Christmas this year. We've always kept a kosher home, since we moved into our house in 2004; but, by the same token, the one accommodation that I've asked for is a Christmas tree. I love Christmas decorations, I love Christmas music, and I love Christmas presents.

By the same token, right now, I'm more than a little bit numb to the whole world right now. I'm not entirely sure what day of the week it is; heck, after sleeping the entire day away, I'm not entirely sure what time it is and whether it's day or night. For the past two years, we've spent Christmas - and most of Channukah, for that matter - in the hospital, and we've spent most of the month of December in the hospital. This means that I haven't done any decorating, any caroling, any anything. Therefore, it doesn't really feel like Christmas. Factor in the fact that my entire interaction with my family over Christmas will be over the telephone or the webcamera, and that just kind of cements the fact that December 25 has turned from my favorite family holiday into just another hospital day.

I'm reasonably certain that we're not going to spend every December in the hospital. I'm reasonably certain that, at some point, I'll be able to have my tree and my decorations - I brought my fun 6-foot inflatable snowman with me to Pittsburgh, among other fun stuff. Right now, it doesn't seem it.

Yet another thing cancer has stolen from us.

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